Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
