You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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