it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I feel like death gave me a hand job
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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