If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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