Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
