Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
