Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
