Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
