butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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