Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
