Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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