That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
