okay pat passed out under dana's car
They should really pass out barf bags in church
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
