You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
