I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
40s are totally the cure
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
