they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
