There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize