I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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