weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
