He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
