You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize