i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
