your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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