I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
My feet surprised me
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
