Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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