Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Screwed.edu
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
