Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
