office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize