guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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