No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
