i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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