David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
