My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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