What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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