Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Bring me that man meat
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize