Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
