Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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