I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
my being single is dangerous.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
