so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
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