I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize