I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
