Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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