i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
