I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Someone stole a lamp last night.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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