Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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