And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
