ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
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