She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
