she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
