life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize